Remember
when you were young and you thought love was this invincible,
bulletproof force that was immune to outside influence, impervious to
evil and capable of overcoming all obstacles? And, then you found out
your girlfriend was sleeping with your best friend since a week after
you met, and that bubble was ruptured, never to be restored again.
Sorry. Maybe we got a little personal on that one. Maybe, you're one
of the lucky few who remains a fool for love, and the wool has yet to
wear away before your eyes. We hate to single-handedly destroy your
remaining naivete, but women do cheat. Thankfully, more often than not,
these kind of things don't often happen without some sort of warning. Or
in some cases, many. Here are intimations of infidelity that should
tentatively raise flags: 10 Signs Your Girlfriend Is Cheating On You.
By Larry
1.She pays more attention to her phone than you.
If you
inevitably spend every dinner glaring at her as she pivots between
various social networks and replies to every text message that springs
up, don't be too quick to write her behaviour off as a sign of the times.
Sure, we're all guilty of being so overly engrossed in our digital
lives that we neglect the present moment. But if she makes a continual
habit of talking to her Twitter followers more than you during dinner
dates, it may point to her lack of investment in the relationship, not
just her fleeting attention span. We don't want to say she might be
spending your night together making plans with someone else, but
stranger things have happened.
2.she's less interested in sex.
Every
couple has sex routines. Maybe three times a week is your norm; maybe
you get it in every night. But if your norm inexplicably changes, and
you find you're battling a new excuse every night, you may want to
investigate what lies at the root of the issue. Is she really too tired
(every damn night)? Has your sex life just gotten that boring? Or, is
she simply disinterested in humping you...because she's getting it
elsewhere?
We're not saying you should draw wild conclusions from a single "not
tonight," but be aware of what normal looks like so you know when your
sex schedule diverges from it, and take the time to discuss what the
real issue is.
3.Her social calendar is suddenly bursting at the seams.
Saturdays
used to be your day. Nothing was said, no plans were made; it was just
assumed that you'd be spending time together. But lately, it seems
something more important to her comes up each week. Your weekly dates
are no longer set in stone, and everything and everyone else takes
precedent.
If you see your quality time slowly dwindling away, it absolutely
points to her waning interest in the relationship, and it could mean she
has transferred her affections elsewhere, or is at least entertaining
the thought.
Independence is healthy, but a new-found focus on partying with her
friends could mean she's putting herself out there again and is
seriously considering pulling the plug on your love.
3.She accumulating new clothes at higher rates than usual.
If
your girl goes into makeover mode and tears through the mall like Sonic
the Hedgehog on a mission, you should take notice. Most women have an
affinity for retail, but if her shopping takes on a rabid focus
seemingly out of nowhere, you should ask yourself why she has become
invested in reinventing herself.
Again, it's about a departure from the norm. If your girl normally
puts on a full face of make-up to run errands, don't think twice about
her putting on mascara to go to the dry-cleaners. But if she's a
sweats-and-Chapstick type of chick, and she suddenly starts taking an
hour to get ready to go out (particularly, without you), you have a
reason to worry.
4.She's overly concerned with your whereabouts.
Remember
when you first met and every day was peppered with a constant exchange
of flirty, borderline-salacious text messages? It's normal for your text
game to fall off from that initial honeymoon phase, but if she takes
hours to respond without explanation, and can't muster up an ounce of
enthusiasm when she does, it's not a good look for your relationship.
There's a real possibility she's under stress at work, or just in an
emotional rut. But if you're able to rule that out (which you can do
with a few simple questions) and you notice she rarely takes the
initiative to text—and if she does, it's to ask where you are—she might
be tracking your whereabouts for less than innocent reasons. We hate to
be the ones to say it, but she's not suddenly interested in the minutiae
of your day—she's covering her ass.
5.She isn’t making plans for the future.
If
you look in your iPhone's calendar, are the upcoming months looking
unusually devoid of commitments? None of her 200 cousins has a wedding
planned, you've yet to confirm any plans for your accrued vacation days,
and hell, you haven't even heard about one of those double dates with
her best friend she usually forces you to pencil in each month.
It's possible she's overwhelmed at work or otherwise preoccupied;
it's also possible she's plotting an escape and is hesitant to extend
any invitations knowing she'll eventually have to rescind them. Or, even
worse, she's too invested in someone new to realize she's been
neglecting your shared social schedule.
This
points to larger issues of being attention-starved, having an
insatiable ego, and otherwise being insecure. But more notably, if she's comfortable batting her eyes at other people in front of you, what is she doing when you're not there?
7.She starts pointing fingers in your direction.
If
your previously secure girlfriend suddenly goes into paranoia mode, you
should take notice. If she snaps at you over seemingly innocent actions
(basically, anything on this list, but in small, completely commonplace
increments), she might be trying to throw you off her scent. By
focusing your attention to your perceived failings, you'll be less apt
to interrogate her about her actual foul play, which is just the way
she'd like it.
8.She makes a point to say she’s unhappy.
It's
easy to misinterpret any of the aforementioned signals as infidelity
when in actuality, there is a perfectly reasonable explanation. But, if
you start noticing that the signs are slowly piling up, and she's
recently admitted she's no longer happy in the relationship, you might
be on the verge of a full-fledged confession.
Guilt is a tricky emotion, and she might feel that by fessing up to
her flailing satisfaction in the relationship, she is offering you (and
herself) an explanation for her selfish actions. Or, she could be
gearing up to act on a long-held impulse, and making her excuses in
advances so she can later utter, "I told you so," with aplomb.
So, she disappeared for five hours for the third time in a week and blamed it on falling asleep, and you actually believed her? That's cute. We guess what they say is true—love is actually blind. We hate to be the ones to pry those stubborn eyelids open, but
if your girl goes M.I.A. for days at a time, you need to stop making
excuses and start getting answers.
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